The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:
Get their Parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of
it.

The next day, the kids came back and, one by one, began to tell
their stories…. There were all the regular types of stuff: spilled milk and
pennies saved. But then the teacher realized, much to her dismay, that only
Ernie was left.

‘Ernie, do you have a story to share?’

‘Yes ma’am.. My daddy told a story about my Aunt Karen. She was a
pilot in Desert Storm, and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy
territory, and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival
knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break
,and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops..
She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed
four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last
Iraqi with her bare hands.’

‘Good Heavens,’ said the horrified teacher. ‘What did your daddy
tell you was the moral to this horrible story?’

‘Stay the hell away from Aunt Karen when she’s been drinking.’